Peer Review 2

Hi Jessica,

I think the context of your letter is very good, but there are a few things I would fix up in regards to appearance and formatting of your letter. I’d break up your main points into smaller paragraphs as it would be easier to read and it does look a bit more professional; as you are writing to Queen Victoria. I understand that you are trying to write in the style of Charles Dickens but for the audience, it makes it harder to follow. Also maybe be future, put your images in between your paragraphs to break up your work.

With your introduction “Dear Her Majesty Queen Victoria”, I found it a tad awkward to read aloud, I’d change it to “To Her Majesty Queen Victoria”. Apart from the structure, I particularly liked how you used the imagery of the snake as smog like Dickens did. And as a history student, I did like the end question to Queen Victoria of “One must enquire Her Majesty, Queen Victoria? Do you not remember the account of Marie Antoinette?”

I look forward to reading more of your blogs and keep up the good work.

https://jessicawelford.wordpress.com/2017/04/01/blog-3-week-5/comment-page-1/#comment-10

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